Well, after two months of "thinking process" about my life, i guess i know what to do next..
I'll go home, back to Russia
Probably two years of wandering around will be enough for now, and its time to take a break and try to understand where is my place..
So, I'll take this break at home.
Because its something stable, and I can think there
Because my family is close
Because its home

And if after some time I decide that my place is in Russia or India, or anywhere else.. - well.. it will be mature decision.. But if I take this kind of decision now - I'm risking to take it based on the influence of some factors like my mood, or short-term opportunities, or whatever else..

And its really time to get on my own feet :)

P.S. don't kick me if in 1 month I'll change my decision again :D

"We are responsible for what we are, and whatever we wish ourselves to be, we have the power to make ourselves. If what we are now has been the result of our own past actions, it certainly follows that whatever we wish to be in future can be produced by our present actions; so we have to know how to act."
Swami Vivekananda

lost.. not found yet

Long time no posts, haa?

Well, last few weeks have been difficult "a bit"..Trying to understand what's going on.. - Got lost absolutely with my life, so trying to find myself back..
Noticed that I'm closing myself more and more, and don't have enough courage to open up..
Story repeats itself, again and again.. its how we say in Russia - the same raker ..Obviously I havent learnt this lesson last time, that's why I'm going through this again.. But still - how stupid I am! Still I cannot get it..
Angry with myself..

...The thought is lost.. to be continued later..

Badly wanted to throw and break something yesterday. My mobile was the only thing around.. It wouldnt survive such a hit. So, had to keep that for myself..